1. the place where one lives
2. the place where one was born
3. central
4. at ease
Many people think of "home" as a central place where they reside permanantly. I on the other hand have many homes. In the past 5 months I have lived in 3 different "homes". The definition of "home" that I can relate to the most is the 4th one: "at ease". Home is where I feel safe and content.
Big Lake Youth Camp is one of those places where I feel safe and content. Some people are afraid to walk through dark places at night, because they feel insecure or vulnerable, but for me at Big Lake I never feel any of those feelings. I love to look up at the thousands of stars that shine so brightly there and listen to the water lap against the shore. I feel protected from the outside world and yet we still encounter every day problems from the outside world through the children who come to our camp with burdens resting on their young hearts. I think one of the biggest reasons kids come to camp is to have a week in a safe place where they don't have to encounter the happenings of their every day lives. Where they can have fun and sleep peacefuly at night.
Last month, when we at BL were evacuated due to a nearing forest fire in the area, I realized how safe I have felt working/living there during the summer. As we were driving away from camp and looking at the smoke over the ridge of Mt. Washington, I prayed to God for His protection. I knew He would protect it, I had no doubt, but that night as I climbed into bed; safe and sound after a long day, I cried myself to sleep, because I couldn't think of a safer place where God has been more evident in my life than at BL. I wanted so badly for that place to be preserved for others to have that experience as well.
Now, a month later, I live in College Place, WA where I am attending Walla Walla University. This place is now my home. I am content and "at ease" here. Life is good. What my eyes have been opened to the most over the past few months is how much God is in control of our lives. Moving from place to place, friends, family, and my personal struggles have all been in His hands. My eyes have been wide open to this experience, this phenomenon that I don't have to have it all figured out, because for me, especially recently, God has shown me and experienced with me this discovery of vulnerability where I give it to Him.
Now, this doesn't mean that I don't worry about things in my life, because I do. I wake up in the middle of the night and often wonder what in the world am I doing here, taking this major? Why did I say yes to that? But because I have put my trust in God, He is quick to remind me that I am where He wants me to be. And for me that has made all the difference on my perspective of where I understand "home" to be for now.
